'twas the night before Valentine's or The worst break-up ever!

'twas the night before Valentine's when all thru the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse

The soft toys were kept on the table with care
In hopes that my love would soon be there

Dinner was prepared and so was the bed
I sat there waiting, holding my head

While i was waiting i poured me a nightcap
I didn't realise when i fell into a nap

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the chair to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters, and threw up the sash.

The alarms came on, the porch lights aglow
Gave the luster of mid-day to objects below

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But my girl in a mini, chugging eight cans of beer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be some prick

More rapid than eagles his curses they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and started callin me names

"Now! ****er, now! ****er, now! *****er, and ***en,
"Oh! Come, on! Come, on! D***** and B****;

So screaming he went  to the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
"Now **** off! **** off! **** off you all!"

So the neighbours woke up as the curses they flew,
With the porch full of puke and empty cans too:

He was dress'd all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnish'd with ashes and soot;

A bundle of "toys" was flung on his back,
And he look'd like a peddler just opening his pack:

The stump of a cigar he held in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.

He was chubby and plump, a right troll-y old elf,
And I laugh'd when I saw him in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know I was gonna be dead.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And started kissing my girl right in front of me that jerk,

Then sticking his finger inside of his nose
He flung forth a booger, up the porch steps he rose.

He sprung to his mini, to my girl gave a whistle,
And away they all drove, like the down of a thistle:

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight
"Happy Valentine's to you, and i'm banging her right!".

The sad state of our country

I don't care if it was indeed Ajmal Kasab's birthday

I don’t give a rats ass for that bastard. 

I’m happy that my family is unharmed. But that doesn’t mean that I’m not pissed angry that this happened again.

How, in spite of all the “naka bandis” and everyone having to leave early for work just to make it in time, that they arrested two “terrorists” 2 days before the blast and didn’t manage to get anything out of them?

Was it really a terrorist attack? Or was it an attempt by those in power to shift the nation’s focus away from what it was fighting for, the Jan Lokpal Bill? And has it always been like this? Every time we are up in arms about something will matters to us, our attention is taken away by a blast or communal riots or something of that kind.

And we WILL bounce back!

YES WE WILL YOU IN POWER! AND YES WE WILL YOU RUNNING THE TV AND RADIO CHANNELS!

But it’s only because we HAVE TO!

And like the last time, WHERE are you? You who makes fiery speeches! You who think you rule this city! Where were you and your “army” when Kasab and his cronies held this city to ransom? Where were you when the bodies need to be carried away? Where were your men when we needed “fighters” to bring them down.

You will beat me up if I hold my girlfriend’s or wife’s hand in public. And your men go drown themselves in booze at whore houses and dance bars.

And Mr. Government official who runs our lives for us, and bleed us dry with taxes so high that we live from payday to next payday. Do you know what has happened in the US of A after 9/11? NOTHING! And do you know why? It’s because they bother about the citizens who brought them into power.

And they fought back!

Who am I? I’m the one asking the questions, before another bomb blows me, and fifty others like me, to bits.

Because soon after, this city will pick up the pieces, limp for a day, and get back to business. Because, we are NUMB!